Updated: Sep 3, 2020
My issue is that I focus on the one bad thing when there are at least one-hundred good things.
My mind stretches toward perfection, a deep yearning for something this world does not contain.
There is pain, suffering, and sorrow.
There is not ONLY pain, suffering, and sorrow.
There is also joy, peace, rest, excitement, and fulfillment.
My focus easily rests on the former list yet evades the latter list with an intensity I can’t describe.
To me, if not everything is great and every day I’m not praised, I feel worthless.
What an insane way to be.
Why can’t I just be?
I just want to be.
No matter what is going on around me or within me… I just. Want. To be.
What does it mean to be?
It’s right there. Right here. This moment. No matter if it’s a storm or the shining sun, to be is right here. Now. Here. No matter what is happening. To be is here. To be is now.